January 11th, 2007


Launch the missles - humanity is so not worth saving.

The obesity epidemic has spread to man's best friend, and so many dogs are getting fat that the government stepped in yesterday by approving the first doggie diet pill.

The Food and Drug Administration announced the approval of Slentrol, a prescription drug that can suppress Fido's appetite while also blocking the absorption of fat from his treats. "This is a welcome addition to animal therapies," said the FDA's Stephen Sundloff. "Dog obesity appears to be increasing."

Experts blamed the same factors that cause people to get fat: too much food and not enough exercise.


Remember people: If you are fat, and your dog is fat... DO NOT take the dog for a walk! Especially do not take the dog for a walk regularly, several times a week. I mean geez, that might really accomplish something. It might make both the dog, and you, healthier. God forbid!
  • Current Music
    MegaDeth - Kick The Chair (from The System Has Failed)