April 1st, 2007

straight to hell

In which we suggest a practical method of impeaching Dubya.

"Nearly everyone in this administration is under indictment or suspicion, nearly every person, from Karl Rove, to Rumsfeld, to Gonzales. What do you have to do to get impeached in this country? What do you have to do?" - Rosie O'Donnell on "The View" March 29th, 2007

Rosie, I'm glad you asked. Because I have the answer! It's clear from the Clinton years that the only thing you have to do in order to get impeached in this country, is GET A BLOWJOB. That's right, let's get Dubya a blowjob. BAM! Impeachment city!!

So, Rosie... you gonna take this one for the team? Got an extra pair of knee pads laying around? Will you help us bring down this president?


(<ring-ring> "Hello? Yes, my dark lord Satan? You say that my room in hell is already furnished?? That's great! See you in 50 years! Bye!!")

Freaky physics: Lord Kelvin's water drip electrostatic spark generator.


Even though water has no overall electric charge, it is full of movable electric charges (called ions). Half of the water's charges are positive and half are negative. It is not hard to separate these charges; simply hold an electrified object near the water. The electrified object will attract the "unlike" charges to the water's surface. It will also repel the "alike" charges away deeper into the water.

In the above diagram, the positive object attracts the water's negative ions and repels the positive ions. This draws an excess of negative ions into the tip of the water dripper, while repelling an equal amount of positive ions off to the other end of the dripper. When the water drop detaches from the tip of the dripper, an overall negative electric charge is still trapped in the droplet. The falling water droplet carries away negative charge, leaving the dripper slightly positive. If we catch the falling droplets in a container, the container will become negatively charged. In the above diagram, negative water droplets will be continuously created forever as long as the water flows.


Evidently, with proper size and shape electrodes, you can get these things up to at least 100 kV. (Though only 1 or 2 uA.) I wonder if you could (slowly) crack water into hydrogen and oxygen, for use in a fuel cell, with the rainwater collected off your roof? It's probably more energy efficient to just run a water-wheel and turn a small generator...
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