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Not this crap again... - Adventures in Engineering — LiveJournal
The wanderings of a modern ronin.

Ben Cantrick
  Date: 2003-11-25 14:02
  Subject:   Not this crap again...

From: Mike
To: Ben
Subject: Re: As for what it's about...

On Tue, Nov 25, 2003 at 12:58:25PM -0700, Mike Rothermel wrote:
> Potential ladies will likely hear you keep a blog,
> do a google on you and know more than you will want
> them to know about you at that time.

Well, I'd quibble with the idea that I "don't want" someone
to know stuff about me. As I said, I long ago realized that I
wear my heart on my sleeve. And further realized that I'm not
sure I want to change that. (Even assuming my changing in such
a way is possible - which I have my doubts about.)

In any event, any woman shallow and insecure enough to be scared
off by some little black letters on a web page is going to be
positively shitting her panties when she meets me in person -
and I've never liked shirking violets. One of the things I
loved about Pa-Chan was that, like me, she too had the ability
to enjoy her mania when it was upon her. A relationship between
me and someone who is so utterly inhibited and tied down
by social mores that merely seeing SOMEONE ELSE being less than
conventional makes them break out into a cold sweat would never
work. I even have a word for such people: "oversocialized". I find
them deathly boring.

So, I think the way I've set things up here works pretty
well. The LJ acts as a filter to deter those who are frightened
and intimidated by strong personalities, thus saving everyone
involved time and trouble.

And if this email exchange we're having here is more than
just hypothetical, you can forward this mail to whoever the
woman in question is. Matter of fact, why don't I post it on
the LJ?

I am Ben Cantrick. I still think the AnimEigo BGC dubs suck.
To foil spammers, no e-mail adress will be given here. (Spammers also suck.)
If you want to e-mail me, remove any African animals in my e-mail address.
"Sapere aude." ("Dare to think for yourself.") -Immanuel Kant

If you can't tell that (at least) half of the stuff in this LJ is humor... give up and shoot yourself in the head NOW.

If you haven't taken the time (say, about 5 minutes) to look at me and notice that I really, truly am nothing more than a boring computer geek (who has a big mouth online)... give up and shoot yourself in the head NOW.

And if you were deeply and personally offended by those last two paragraphs... that's right: GIVE UP AND SHOOT YOURSELF IN THE HEAD NOW!! (Cuz you still don't get it! ;])

"Imperious, choleric, irascible, extreme in everything, atheistic to the point of fanaticism. There you have me in a nutshell, and kill me again or take me as I am - for I shall not change."

-The Marquis De Sade

Three points to consider before dating me:


"Don't take this too seriously."


And to re-iterate once again...


What it boils down to for me is this: Mike's mail seems to be saying, "You need to keep parts of you hidden, cover up what you really are, pretend to be something else, in order to attract women." And when you get right down to it, I feel that is deeply dishonest. And so I refuse to do it. I don't care if it's what everyone else does - I'm not a lemming who jumps off the cliff just because that's where the crowd is going. I'm not going to try and put on a false face for anyone. It only bites you in the ass when they learn who you really are. I'm gonna be me from minute 1. And if that scares or intimidates someone, then I'm sorry, but that's their problem. And really, things are better this way - because trying to have a relationship with someone who's deeply scared of you is a sure-fire recipe for misery. Of which I've had enough. So no thanks.

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  User: (Anonymous)
  Date: 2003-11-25 23:23 (UTC)
  Subject:   re:
Preach on with the Gospel Brother Ben!
Preach on!


^v^ Dan ^v^
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Ben Cantrick
  User: mackys
  Date: 2003-11-25 23:30 (UTC)
  Subject:   I preach too much.
Need to do a little more practicing. :P

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  User: mrothermel
  Date: 2003-11-26 00:30 (UTC)
  Subject:   not really
Thats not what I am saying. And, I'd write you back, but you would just end up posting it on LJ. Bwah ha ha ha ha.... :)
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Ben Cantrick
  User: mackys
  Date: 2003-11-26 03:11 (UTC)
  Subject:   Well hell then...
Post it right here in the comments! I mean, that's why I have comments enabled...

I'm really, really, really curious why you think the stuff I post in this LJ will scare people off. It simply does not compute in my brain. Enlighten me.

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Nikkou: legs
  User: jumblies
  Date: 2003-11-26 04:03 (UTC)
  Subject:   I want to see Ben..
on that Bachelor show. (GWAHAHAHAHA!!!!!! urmph.. excuse me..)

As someone who is considered 'unusual', politely termed by people to my face, let me tell you that it's not worth conforming. The people you're being 'good' for will always suspect you're doing something behind their back they can't deal with, and you will have to deal with suppressing part of yourself and the dishonesty of it all.

Experience tells me that, in time, the attractions of the people I fall for will fade, but their faults will deepen. I believe this is true for everyone (and how we feel for everything). Some people build a dreamworld of pleasantness and live in it. I can't do that. I don't want to live with someone who won't work with me to continually build a relationship. I can't live in their legoworld.

I would probably be the first to be volunteered as a Stepford wife. :)

Ben needs to move to San Francisco where it's normal to be different.
(Besides, I need someone to stay with when I go up. haha! ;)
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Ben Cantrick
  User: mackys
  Date: 2003-11-27 04:58 (UTC)
  Subject:   Re: I want to see Ben..
on that Bachelor show. (GWAHAHAHAHA!!!!!! urmph.. excuse me..)

I can just see their panicing, screaming, faces right now. I would grin evilly as they fled in terror. ;]

Ben needs to move to San Francisco where it's normal to be different.

Man, if I thought making rent in Boulder was hard...
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  User: ashfae
  Date: 2003-11-26 00:39 (UTC)
  Subject:   (no subject)
I kind of relate. More than one person has told me that I should act like a bitch and be generall cruel in order to attract people. I don't get it, and frankly it's just not in me to be that kind of manipulative. Besides, why would I want to date somebody who thought I was a bitch? *shrug* I'd rather be single and straightforward; makes my life significantly less complicated.
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Rosie the queen of Corona
  User: pugzie
  Date: 2003-11-27 02:25 (UTC)
  Subject:   (no subject)
Hey! Have you found something to do Thanksgiving? Zach and I might jst order a pizza, you are more than welcome to come and bring any other family-less people. ^_~ I'm not sure.
I work 8-6, then the next day at 7 so no drinkie for me either. Give me a call sometime! Take care,
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Rosie the queen of Corona
  User: pugzie
  Date: 2003-11-27 02:26 (UTC)
  Subject:   (no subject)
And I use to totally take you seriously. I learned!! ^_~
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Ben Cantrick
  User: mackys
  Date: 2003-11-27 05:01 (UTC)
  Subject:   Cool, I'll call.
But I've lost Zack's cell # again. (20 entries in my cell phone's phone book just ain't enough...) Could you email it to me - mackys@kaosol.net? (Or call me on the cell and leave it for me in a voice mail, 303-817-5817). I've got some ideas for T-day I want to bounce off you guys.

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May 2015